Looking for Ways to Get Through The
Upcoming Holiday Season?
Here You Go...My Top Ten Tips!
 
 
We all need a little humor to lighten up our day -
so here are some tips sure to put a smile on your face!

#10.   Only eat foods that you can personally catch or harvest with your own hands.

#9.   Only eat foods that start with the letter ‘z’.

#8.  Eat only seasonal items, like reindeer, elves, pine cones, and poinsettia salad.

#7.   Wash your Christmas cookie before eating them.

#6.   Set a time after which you will not eat...like 10:30 pm, the night before.

#5.  Avoid Stress-   take Valium instead of food, it has fewer calories.

#4.  Increase activity.  Instead of using elevators and escalators, buy some mountain climbing equipment and scale the outside of the building.

#3.  Avoid all nuts and fruitcakes- such as Weird Uncle Henry and your crazy sister-in-law Bertha.

#2.   Become pregnant two week before Thanksgiving, so that you’ll be nauseated all the time during the holidays.

And here it is...the Top Number One Tip!

#1.  Don’t stop on the way home from Holiday parties and eat the road kill! (Darn - ruins all the fun, doesn't it?!)